Welcome back, and welcome to the new home of A Work In Progress!
I am so excited to be back and writing again especially in this beautiful new space… it finally feels like me!
What do you guys think? I Would love to hear your thoughts?
I wanted to start this week’s blog off by asking how you are? Feel free to share, I’d really loved to know.
This space was always created with the intent it would become a safe place for people to connect and chat. I know i preach it a lot but having someone to talk to is extremely important and so beneficial.
Not only that but something else I push a lot is kindness, you only ever see the version of person that they want you to see and as a human race we have become worryingly good at ‘putting on a brave face’, or as I always refer to it… it’s time to put on ‘my face’ (my make-up, my mask) and let the show the begin!
We are all human, we all have feeling’s and we all have shit going on, so just try to remember that as you go about your day, not every smiling face feels the happiness that is on display.
If there is one phrase/quote I despise it has to be ‘put on a brave face’. To me this means if you are not feeling yourself or are going through a difficult time, that you should smile and act as though everything is fine, and actually when I looked it up it said the meaning was and I quote ‘to behave as if a problem is not important or does not worry you’. This is the kind of shit advise we are given and told to do all the time and it is so damaging!
The messages that it gives are just despicable, firstly it suggests that your problems and worries are not something that should be shared, that we keep it to ourselves because your worries are no one else’s concern and that we should carry them alone.
It implies that being brave is smiling and acting like nothing is wrong which is of course the opposite of what we should be doing and encouraging, ignoring something doesn’t make it go away, it simply allows it to grow and magnifies the situation.
It also suggests that being or feeling anything other than happy isn’t brave!!
People seem surprised by the suicide figures but is it any wonder when we are being conditioned to thinking that bravery comes only in the form of a smile?
I teach my children that we have and feel different emotions for a reason, and that if you feel a certain way then you should allow yourself to display those emotions and not supress them, for example never saying the words, ‘stop crying like a baby!’
Bravery comes in many different forms, being brave is getting up and showing up day after day whether that’s for you, your children, work or a pet.
Bravery is waking and feeling like you can’t do the day and so you listen to what your mind and body is telling you and crawl back into bed.
Bravery is opening up to someone you trust and sharing what’s been going and or how you’re truly feeling.
Bravery is feeling so much worry or anxiety about a situation but doing it anyway.
Bravery is also feeling so much worry or anxiety about a situation and admitting that it’s too much and not doing it.
Bravery is asking for help.
Bravery comes in the form of every emotion,
Bravery is feeling
Content…The list is endless.
If we continue to supress our feeling’s and encourage others to do the same, we will never see an end to the constant rise in lives tragically taken by suicide. People need to know that it’s okay to feel whatever emotion it is they are feeling, that life is not linear and it’s completely natural to have the good days and the bad, and sometimes the rain feels like it’s never going to stop falling but be reassured that the sun always shines eventually. They need to know that talking about it with someone you love and or trust is ALWAYS a good idea, a conversation can be the reasoning we needed to hear, the perspective we hadn’t seen.
To know that brave can be to keep going but can also be to stop!
It’s time to lose the narrative that brave always looks happy and is always saying yes!
Take the time to check in with yourself and with others.
Share a smile not a judgement